INFJ’s when we even get to the point of some small amount of knowledge of ourselves, it ends up leading to just more questions. It’s almost like opening up one door, to discover on the other side, three other doors appear. The common sticking point is that we look outside ourselves (Fe) to try and solve this riddle. The riddle is to uncover the true authentic self.
The funny thing that INFJ’s don’t initially understand is that the majority of people that we interact with, do not think the way we do. 1 out of 100 women test as INFJS, and the odds are lower for men, where the odds are less than 1 out of 200.
If you are an INFJ and you want to know yourself better, looking to others won’t do much good. Deep introspection, meditation, journaling, and plenty of reading will fit the bill. Luckily INFJ’s are great researchers and ponderers, by nature.
The fact is that (Fi) Introverted Feeling is a shadow function. It ranks in 6th place in the 8 layer functional stack for INFJ’s. Because Introverted Feeling is so low on the list, the INFJ will struggle to understand themselves, and how they truly feel inside. I would equate it to peering into a fogged up mirror. You can see the outline of your body, but the details are hidden. In order to overcome this hurdle, a lot of concerted effort will need to be invested in order for the INFJ to slowly wipe the mirror away, and reveal a more clear image.
After over a year of self introspection, a lot of reading, self reflection, meditation, daily journaling, and yes blogging, I am still amazed at how little I understand myself. Honestly I am fine with this. It is in my genes to self reflect for the rest of my life. I find joy from it. I enjoy reading about Psychology, Myers Briggs, Carl Jung, and for the first time in my life, I have made enough progress where things are starting to make more sense. I’m starting to form a big picture of my true self, something that has been missing my whole life.
So honestly, I am not complaining about not knowing myself. It is a riddle that I enjoy unraveling. This journey of self discovery doesn’t seem to be coming to a end anytime soon, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Here are a few books that helped me a fair amount, if you are interested in learning more about Type, and Temperament.
- Beside Ourselves – Our Hidden Personality in everyday life – Naomi L. Quenk
- Please Understand Me – Temperment character Intelligence – David Keirsey
- INFJ Personality: The Tao of Personality